Soap
Soap That's What She Said
$13.00
Why is this so hard? That�s what she said! And who is she, you ask? The kinda person who has an office and a workspace, that's who. I mean, what kind of sociopath can create in the same place they...
Soap Stoners
$13.00
It's 4:20 somewhere... Blaze it! You don�t have to be in Colorado to get stoned; but it kinda helps when you don�t have to buy your grass from the sketchy high school D.A.R.E. officer like the rest of us. Best...
Soap Mom Brain
$13.00
Phone in the fridge again. I used to have functioning brain cells, but that no-good husband of mine screwed me over and now I have feral children instead. If I have to hear, "Mom, he's hitting me" and, "Call 911!"...
Soap I'm Too Sexy
$13.00
Too sexy, baby. The truth hurts. At least for this less-sexy-than-me soap. I mean, it's sexy and all, but not as sexy as moi. In fact, looking around, I'm a little too sexy for my surroundings, and I'm not just...
Soap Grammar Police
$13.00
Smells annoying. Just wanted to shoot a quick message to let you know how impressed we all are that you finally figured out the difference between your and you're, thanks to Facebook trolls. True, it was something the rest of...
Soap Introvert Scented
$13.00
People suck. That�s why you prefer to stay inside with your vintage stuffed animal collection. But even enjoying your own company requires some ambiance. Ideally from this candle in a non-confrontational ocean blue. Blue Raspberry Jell-O Note: Because all of...
Soap Big Families
$13.00
Maybe one day. I'd never yelled the word "motherf*ck!" in front of small children until that day I stepped on my first Lego from hell. Sorry, kiddos, but that was simply unavoidable. And that's the day my baby-sitting career ended....
Soap Alone Time
$13.00
Why you so thick? Boy, are you terrible at taking hints. When I started responding to all your inane questions with random non-sequiturs, you didn't flinch. When I quit looking you in the eye, nada. And when I screamed "leave...
Soap It's 10 AM Somewhere
$13.00
Amateur hour. 10 A.M? You have to be joshing around. I set my alarm every morning for 5:30 to get the party started. The early bird gets the buzz, as they say. I mean, if you think I'm going to...
Soap Soul Mates
$13.00
My soul mate? The truth of the matter is, that when I think of potential soul mates, I tend to think in terms of food, cats, booze, naps, Netflix, and knee socks. Oh. And you. Of course, you. I meant...
Soap Feeling Good As Hell
$13.00
That's right. I do my hair toss, check my nails, baby how you feelin'? Yeah, that song had a moment. But you know what? I'm still feeling good as hell! Might be the booze talking (it is), but I think...
Soap Baby Bumps
$13.00
Oh, this? No, this is just a little beer belly that will end up wrecking my body and taking over my life for the next 18 years, not to mention all the incontinence and insatiable desire for lukewarm milk. No...
Soap Namaste
$13.00
Ommmm. I'm not saying yoga pants make you look 20% hotter, but I'm not saying they don't, either. So let's all take a moment to silently express our gratitude for yoga pants. And by "silently express," of course I mean...
Soap Man's Man
$13.00
Blizzard Campfire Scented Net Weight: 6 oz. Note: Because all of our soaps are handmade, no two bars are identical.
Soap It's Only Frickin' Tuesday
$13.00
Ugggggggh. How is it only TUESDAY? It's been a full year since the work week started. I swear I can feel each individual cell in my body slowly dying to the beat of that annoying wall clock. And Glen in...
Soap It's Fine
$13.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.
Soap Hot Messes
$13.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.
Soap Drinking Buddies
$13.00
Meet me after work? Haha. Like I have to ask. I'll see you at 5:01 p.m. on our usual stools at our usual spot with our usual drinks. There's such comfort in rituals. Speaking of rituals, I'm in the bathroom...
Soap Dad Bods
$13.00
Real men have curves. Mmmmm... marshmallows. And now there's no reason to feel guilty for indulging. Thanks to an incredible new development in the "hot guy" category, Dad Bods are officially in! 21-year-olds are into you, and 21-year-olds are never...
Soap Cool Aunt
$13.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label.
Soap Beer Whisperers
$13.00
Fresh banana bread anyone? That's just the tip. I've moved on to baguettes, challah and focaccia. Don't believe me? Check all my social media, hater. I'm practically a one-person artisan bread bakery at this point. And check it tomorrow. I've...
Soap Besties
$13.00
Let's unpack this. And by that, I mean let's unpack everything. I have soooo many things I need to tell you since I last saw you 12 hours ago. And nobody else understands my bitching the way you do! We've...
Soap Social Anxiety
$13.00
I'm *cough* super sick Otherwise, I would TOTALLY go to your [insert any social event here]. You know how much I love mingling. It's just that I broke my glass eye again and then I set the waterbed on fire....
Soap A New Home
$13.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.
Soap Awkward Moments
$13.00
Um, awkwaaard. Ah, memories. Look, everyone has a few awkward moments in their past. Flat-out embarrassing and impossible to shake off, this is the stuff life is made of. I should know. I clock in two or three of these...
Soap Working From Home
$11.00
Oh yay... Another zoom meeting in ten minutes. I'm still on the one that started two hours ago and I don't think it's ever gonna end. How the heck am I supposed to refill my coffee mug with more whiskey...
Soap Zero Fucks
$13.00
None to give. We hear you. You're so over it you can't even. This newly-concocted bad attitude is just what the doctor ordered! Plus, none of us really liked it when you were just a simple, caring, average Joe. So...
Soap Lefties
$12.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label.
Soap Cat People
$13.00
Hairball much? Your cats are circling the tub, but don't count on them joining you unless you really are bathing in warm milk. And maybe you are. You cat people are cuh-razy. I should know. I have 14. What? Don't...
Soap Calm the Fuck Down
$12.00
Calm your tits. Yeah, yeah, everything is going to hell in a hand basket but come on, man! It's like yoga time. Meditation hour. So put those rainforest sounds in your AirPods and take a breather. Because I expect you...
Soap Being Awesome
$12.00
Cool story, bro. You know how some people try really hard to be awesome and other people are just naturally that way? It's like the difference between some suuuper lame story about like, college credits or your thesis, and a...
Soap Salty Servers
$12.00
Can we move to that booth over there? I�ve got a tip for you: Don�t expect me to smile when I bring your custom salad: Hold the lettuce, arugula, croutons, cheese and onions, zebra milk dressing on the side, oh...
Soap Fun Uncle
$12.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label.
Soap Fucking Meetings
$12.00
Meetings. The icing on the arsenic cake that is any weekday morning, afternoon or evening. And speaking of evenings... didja have to schedule the WebEx for 6:15 p.m. on a Friday, Becky? All to tell me you�d put feedback in...
Soap Dog People
$13.00
Smells like drool. But you're used to that, right? In fact, if I had to guess I'd say your dog is probably sitting in the tub with you right now. Not that I blame you. My dog Charlie is tucked...
Soap Shit Show
$12.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label.
Soap Caffeine Addicts
$12.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.
Soap Gen Z
$12.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label.
Soap Office Naps
$12.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label.
Soap Introvert
$12.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.
Soap Day Drinking Soap
$12.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.
Soap Trophy Husband
$13.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.
Soap Napping
$13.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.
Soap First World Problems
$12.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.
Soap #Goals
$12.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.
Soap Hangovers
$13.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.
Soap Queens
$12.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.
Soap Dad Jokes
$13.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.
Soap Neat Freak
$12.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.
Soap Millennials
$12.00
Handmade vegan soap bar designed by our in-house soap artisans with fragrance blends to match our corresponding candle. Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label. Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.
